I am writing this on the toilet.
Moments ago I shouted at my friend, as I pushed him out of my way, that I needed to go to the bathroom, now. His response was something along the lines of, "but it's the other way" or some crap, I don't know.
The point is, as I have gone about this endeavor, I have realized I have become a prejudiced man. I don't consider all bathrooms to be equal. I judge them on the... type of their toilet.
It's the goddamn auto-flush. I can barely snap the pic before the bastard is hauling off my long awaited reddish-taupe colored treasure. BB's bathrooms are dead to me. I can't use them if I need to boom-boom.
FM- now them bathrooms the shits. Clean a fuck, no one around, and they have flush handles.
About an hour and a half ago I started to feel it, growing inside me, like some sort of unholy parasite it has been an enormous strain on my energy. I now remember the glee with which I devoured the remainders of my Chinese food last night (sesame chicken, crab rangoon, fried rice), at two in the morning, only about five hours after an enormous meal of meatloaf and mashed potatoes with extra gravy.
Then it hit me, about ten minutes ago, and I was in BB. There are not bathrooms there. I waddled as fast as the bun in the oven would allow, trying to think of where the closest flush-handle toilet would be. I will post this and the picture after I poop. I hope it is as awesome as the agony I have gone through.
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Dammit. Just another set of floaters. Fuck, I need to get over this sickness.
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